Shield (WIP)

Have you ever wondered how to find and protect your inner flame? It is made up of all your hopes, dreams, cares, passions and aspirations, no matter how distant, difficult or unlikely they are. Everybody has one, even if they never think of it, or even feel they don't have one. It gives their will the justification it needs to forge ahead. That's why you're here, both in living your own life, and being a part of the lives of every single person around you.

It lets you know there's something greater beyond any obstacle you currently face, no matter how large it is. It is always there to remind you of why you are here, gives you motivation to bring your hopes, ambitions and aspirations to life, to take that next step to inch you just that much closer to something that brings you fulfillment. Not everyone listens to it, but for as long as you are here, it is always there to give you purpose, and always there should you be ready to seek it's guiding light to explore your life.

Some of us are gifted enough to be born so preciously close to their flame. It burns brightly for them, from it they are able to draw almost limitless energy to forge ahead with their dreams, and through it they in turn are a beacon of life and energy amongst us.

For me to try explain my journey so far, requires a little metaphysical indulgence *chuckles*

I've long explored the hallways of the mind, and have used the flames precious distant light to peer into various rooms I have felt attracted to, in search for something that you could say is my calling, something to give me purpose and fulfillment. I never have been close to this 'flame', which in turn has made venturing deeper into any of these rooms difficult or impossible, because the faint light from the hallway is too little for me to see a future path, to take the next steps, nothing for your will to latch onto and forge deeper with.

The few doors I had poked my head into more than six years ago, lead to my current IT career and creative past-times. But as I try to walk deeper in any of them, my steps are shrouded in darkness. Looking back out into the hall, I am met by many other half-opened doors, never explored further than where the distant flames light reached.

There are few other doors left to open, at least with the knowledge I can honestly pour my heart and motivation into whatever lies beyond them. The problem lies not with the endless opportunities which exist beyond any one of them. The opportunities are there, they always were and will be... but without that flame close by, the ability to reach out and hold onto something new, to cherish it and pour myself into it becomes so very difficult.

For the first time in my life, I really don't know where to go next, or even who to be, and it's a feeling of being lost in your own mind that's awfully close to fear.

Drae is here to remind me I do still have something precious to hold close, a path explored that is close to the core of my being, but I can't yet see or understand it fully. He protects that path, shielding it with his leathery wings spread, calling out to remind me never to forget it, in hopes I can soon travel it with him, to reinvigorate both my heart and mind, with the flame to guide me through and beyond.


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This art is a WIP by the awesome dschunai - who has allowed me to post this here; she's been so kind and understanding (and just a little busy *chuckles*). I've pondered over this piece and how to express the meaning of it through words for a long time. The beautiful scene dschu created has been such a tremendous help, and I feel this is a wonderful conduit for me to try express what I've been feeling most of my life, but ever more strongly for the past year now.

The writing, too, is a work in progress, but I feel just a little better at getting this out in the open. (It is related in a way to this piece, which forms part of a deeper story I hope work on again.)